What’s The Best Dating Advice?
There are plenty of advisors on the dating scene – there are videos and articles about every aspect of dating, with all these great pieces of advice: “What to do on a date,” “What not to do before a date” and “How to find out if he/she is the one.” There are many myths about dating that have persisted for years now and we all believe in them. “If he likes you, he will text you first,” “You shouldn’t text him first after the date,” “You should have sex on the third date, not earlier, because he might think you’re a whore. “Don’t respond to his text message right away, wait a few hours, make him think about you”. I swear – this is all crap.
What I’ve recently noticed is that you should definitely avoid listening to outside advice instead of your own intuition. I’m back on dating scene (after a long period of not caring) and I have one piece of advice for you – do what feels right to you. If you want to text him first – do it; if you want to sleep with him – do it; if you want to ask him out – do it. Why do I think this is the only right way? Because I believe that the most valuable thing in the world you have is time. And why waste it on waiting? I made that mistake recently – I waited a few weeks (and let my mind become occupied with all kinds of different scenarios that I came up with, none of which made sense) and when I finally couldn’t stand it anymore, I just texted the guy, and five minutes later we had a date. Did it matter who texted whom when we met? No, it didn’t; not for me. Will there be the second date? I don’t know, but if not, it wouldn’t be because I texted him first. And if that was the case – it only means the guy is not for me. It’s 2018; men have power and women have power. Let’s use it the way we want to. Does it really matter who texts whom? I don’t think so.
I know that there is this theory that a guy should text a girl first, because “he’s a hunter” and he needs to feel like he “fights for the woman,” but let me tell you one thing – if a woman has balls to text you, it only means that there will be plenty of times to prove to her that you’re a strong man, because she will not make it easy for you, that’s for sure. This type of woman usually knows what she wants and who she wants to be with, so you still have to deliver. The mere fact that you’re there is not enough for her. Since she made that first step, she expects something more and if that doesn’t happen, she will just simply move on. To the real hunter.
I believe that there are no rules when it comes to dating and sex. They say, “don’t have sex on a first date, because he will never see you again.” Well, with a few we met up again, and with a couple, we did not. And it’s the same with every aspect of dating. Just don’t wait. If he doesn’t respond to your text message, it just means he wasn’t interested anyway and you just saved yourself many days or weeks. If he doesn’t want to see you after you had sex – it’s not about the sex, he didn’t want to have anything more regardless of the way the date ended up. There should be only one rule in dating – just be yourself. You want to ask certain questions – ask; you want to see him again – let him know; you want to invite him somewhere – just do it. And if you don’t want to do any of these things – don’t do them. It’s fine. Make yourself happy first and do things that feel natural to you. And don’t do anything that you “think you should do.” Only you know what’s the right way. And one more thing – remember that there is always (ALWAYS!) another fish in the sea. So don’t waste your time on the one who seems like he’s drowning instead of finding his way against the current.