Step 32 – Have Distance Towards Yourself

There is one thing that I find really unattractive in a person – when they don’t have any distance towards themselves. Sorry, but for me, that’s an immediate bummer. I personally don’t like it when people treat themselves too seriously. That’s why I love my friends: we all can laugh at each other and no one gets offended (and there are some harsh words coming out sometimes… well, always). I couldn’t be friends with folks who would make me care about every word I say. I LOVE (LOVE LOVE) when someone is making fun of me. It’s pure joy for me (I know it sounds weird). I like it because it helps me to realize what kind of habits or behaviors I have – and I usually am not aware of them at all.

I got to the point in my life when can laugh at myself harder than anyone else. Because why not…? Why do you treat yourself so seriously…?  I always wanted to be perfect (and am still fighting it), but I understood that I will never achieve total perfection, so… how about letting go? I just got honest with myself. This is my face (I could change it, but I have no money for it and I don’t want to do it in a first place – why would you want to ruin perfection anyway…?); this is my body – it’s not that bad at all – my stomach is still not “quite there” yet, but at least I got great legs and some boobs; and there are the habits that I have to work on (too judgmental, but not as I used to be, and a smartass – this hasn’t changed). My skin is not perfect, my teeth are not perfect, my hair is thin, but I love my eyes and my height. And a few other things. You can apply as many changes to your look as you want, but if one day you just don’t say to yourself: Ok, that’s it, this is who I am and I have to start accepting myself no matter what; then nothing will help you.

The truth is – if you have money nowadays, you can change almost everything about yourself (except for your height, but I expect this will also change at some point).  But here comes the question – when are these changes going to end? If you fix one thing, most likely you would want to fix another one – and then another. In that case – it’s just a waste of money because you’ll never be satisfied. Why wouldn’t you celebrate the fact that you look different, that you look like no one else in the world…? Why aren’t you proud that there is no one like you? Don’t point out things that you don’t like – focus on these parts of your body that are great (and everyone has them, so don’t give me this crap that “it’s all wrong”). Just celebrate yourself!

There are too many amazing things going in the world on a daily basis. Focusing on yourself and your imperfections makes no sense at all. It’s a complete waste of time. Do yourself a favor – and let it go. There was a reason why you came to this world looking like that, so embrace it and be happy about it. Besides, not everyone finds the person you admire so much as attractive as you think. Recently I keep bumping into couples that I would never pair with each other (I think that Universe is trying to tell me something…) – I would picture both of them with someone different and yet they find each other most attractive and are in love. We all like different things and there are people who find you – yes: you – the most attractive person they have ever met. So chill out, man. And be kind to yourself. And now get up, walk up to the mirror, and smile to yourself (or take a selfie). You’ll be just fine.