Step 5: Calm Yourself Down

I do believe that any kind of change – no matter if it’s about your body, your job, or your relationship –  must start from the inside. Everything starts in your mind, or to be more precise – it starts with changing your mindset. People usually don’t realize that nothing will change if they don’t change their thinking. Do you know the saying: If you want to achieve something you’ve never had, you have to do things you’ve never done before? I wrote in “Step 2” how important it is to be grateful for what you already have.  It’s a key step, probably the most important one to really start changing whatever it is that you need to change. But to actually start doing so, you have to finally calm yourself down a bit. I started meeting people who taught me how important it is to calm my mind first. Many people don’t even think about it: they don’t even notice that they run away from their thoughts into social media or other kinds of stimulation. And I think what we really need is something that’s the exact opposite – no stimulation at all. This is the way to find ourselves again. 

What I advise you to do is to find some time for yourself. Ideally, it would be an hour every day (you can do half an hour in the morning and half an hour in the evening). Spend this time only with yourself, only with your own thoughts. Put your laptop away (not to mention your phone), listen to sea waves if you have a chance to do so, listen to the wind, or to relaxing music, or simply sit in silence. Allow yourself not to think (you will be surprised what kind of thoughts come to your mind). Unfortunately, doing this once a week for only a few weeks will not do the work. Do it a few times a week for at least a few months (the best option would be to make it a part of your daily routine). You will not only become more relaxed: you will become more clear about what is that you really want and who you actually have become in the last months, or even years. Find the time to examine your life, the events that happened during the day, the conversations you had; simply stop yourself in your tracks for a bit in order to understand what’s going on in your mind. Most of us don’t know ourselves anymore. We know our social media profiles, but we have no clue who we really are. So just give yourself a break – and let your mind fly.