Things I Learned in New York I Wouldn’t Have Learned Anywhere Else

1. It’s OK to walk in sweatpants out on the street – it’s not being sloppy, it’s just wearing sweatpants

2. It’s OK to wear shorts in Winter: you will walk inside a gym or down to the subway in a second anyway

3. A meal with no ranch dressing is no meal at all

4. Coffee is not merely a caffeine-carrying beverage, but a complex drink the mere description of which at Starbucks may make you wonder what the hell just happened

5. You can still look great and have a fantastic body in your 30s, 40s and 50s

6. Thursday is the new Friday and it’s high time to go out

7. It’s OK to ask a stranger how are they doing, where are they going, what are they reading 

8. You can be allergic to so many things, you need to change your order trice at a restaurant

9. Animals can provide “emotional support”, so you need to bring them everywhere, especially to restaurants

10. You can explode of impatience, for someone made you wait for whole 5 minutes

11. You better pack a pair of flat shoes into your handbag when you head out to a party: nothing will make you happier than the sight of them once you leave the club.

12. It’s OK to smile at people in the street

13. It’s OK to walk to work with your hair still wet – they will eventually dry

14. You can speak of total bullshit in full seriousness (“the Kardashians”, “my doorman situation”, etc.)

15. A cockroach is a natural part of an apartment

16. Time for a coffee at your place before work is a luxury

17. A washing machine and a dryer at your place is the biggest luxury of all

18. It’s the male salesmen who give you the best tips at a beauty store; no one knows more of beauty than gay men

19. You get excited when you see an attractive guy with a girlfriend at his side – at least chances are he’s straight

20. It’s OK to wear a plastic bag over your head, or something equally nuts – everyone expects you to be at least a little bit crazy here since we’re all trying to believe we’re living in the most exciting place on the planet