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NY Love Story A.D. 2019
I don’t like romantic comedies. And I can tell you why. Once, it used to be my favorite genre, but I grew up since then (a bit). Also — I moved to NY. Romantic comedies just don’t ...

When Was the Last Time Your Journal Embarrassed You?
When was the last time you said to yourself: “This is embarrassing”, and you actually meant yourself…? Well, it just happened to me. I sat down to write about something else and I...

Why It’s Important To Not Look Like Shit
Here is my question: Why do you think it’s a good idea to look like shit at home? Some people put on their worst clothes at home - clothes with holes, stretched out, worn out, old and ugly. (B...

You Have to Kiss a Lot of Frogs To… Find the Frog That Rises to Your Standards
I’ve had a few men in my life so far, and they always disappeared at some point (nowadays, I realize that they actually did me a favor). Once, I used to think it was the end of the world, but ...

You Have To Punch Back
There is a saying in NY: If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere. And there is a reason for that. I always say that a relationship with this city is like a relationship with an abusive boy...

Why Does Time Have Value
I recently noticed that I’m able to guess how long a person have lived in NYC. It’s not that I know the exact number of years, but I can recognize if someone has been living here for jus...

Wait For the Understanding Nod
I recently chatted on Instagram with a guy (we haven’t met in real life, he just saw my photos on social media) and he said this thing, and I quote: “How come you’re still single? ...

Step 63 - It’s All About Priorities
I know a guy in NY who doesn’t like to spend money on a cup of coffee. He doesn’t understand why anyone would spend $6 on a cup of coffee when you can pay $15 for a whole bag. But at the...

“The Top Five Regrets of Dying” - Regret Number One
This is a continuation of my posts about Bronnie Ware’s “The Top Five Regrets of Dying,” this being the last one. I wrote about Regret Numbers Five, Four, Three and Two here. Regr...

Love is Born
I watched “A Star is born” recently and can’t stop thinking about this movie.  It’s a story that has been told in Hollywood many times already: that of a seasoned mus...

Just Like NY on UrbanCreativiti-tea.com!
I'm happy to have a guest apperance on Urban Creativi-tea! Thank you for having me! It's an honor!  If you're looking for any (fashion) inspiration check them out http://urbancreativi-tea.c...

“The Top Five Regrets of Dying” - Regret Number Two
I continue my posts about Bronnie Ware “The Top Five Regrets of Dying”, I wrote about regret number five here, four here and three here. The second regret is - I wish I hadn’t...

“The Top Five Regrets of the Dying” - Regret Number Four

added: 2018-10-11 , category: Transform Yourself

I continue my posts about Bronnie Ware’s “Five Top Regrets of the Dying”. I wrote about regret no. 5 here.


The fourth regret is: „I wish I stayed in touch with my friends”. I don’t think I can fully sympathize with this point, because since I’m single, I still hang out with my friends a lot. I don’t do it every week, but I do it often (plus we exchange messages all the time). I think that this titular scenario happens when you have your own family and you lose touch with most of your friends (at least my Mom says that this is the case).


Most people think that having a partner will cure everything for them: from overcoming your fears, healing your wounds, attaining your happiness and giving you entertainment. You get a partner and you forget about your friends, because you „don’t need them” anymore (at least this is what you think). Their company is not that necessary anymore, not to mention the fact that now you go out almost exclusively with other couples (and suddenly you are incapable of going out only by yourself; it looks like you and your partner are joined at the hip - that’s the weirdest thing to me, btw). The thing you don’t understand is that you really need your friends, especially when you’re in a relationship. I believe that friendship is the most important set of relationships in your life, because you choose your friends and they choose you based solely on the character, not visual traits. And it’s not about sexual tension, either. Sex is not involved, so it doesn’t mess up with your head. It’s pure love (sometimes hate), understanding, drinking, crying and travel time together. And most of the times - your friends know you better than your partner does. 


I’m writing this, but at the same time I myself am not in touch with many of my old friends. And it’s not that I don’t care, sometimes it’s just the matter of time (it’s physically impossible for me now to stay in touch with everyone). But sometimes it’s about something else, too. 

I’ve written about friends on Just Like NY a few times already (even recently) and I do believe that you become the average of the five people you spend most time with. I recently also read to be careful about whom do you spend your time with, because this person changes you - not other way around. So I choose my friends differently now. Not based on “do we like the same movies”, but if we get the best out of each other. I choose those who inspire me and who also want me to do more. 


I go for quality over quantity.  Remember that you change (at least I hope you do) and some of your friends don’t - or else, they don’t want you to change. So you have to decide. And sometimes you just have to let them go (it’s very difficult, btw). As I said recently - give what you get. And then take care of the friends you’ve chosen. Don’t forget about those who give you love and support. You’ll need each other, so make sure they are on the top of your priority list.

 


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