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Step 51 - What Should Be Your Main 2018 Goal?
Some people hesitate to set any New Year goals and resolution for themselves; they just find them stupid. I can understand that. But then some others – like me – take them seriously, be...

I Can’t Help Women if They Don’t Want to Help Themselves
Ladies, I can’t cope with you. I really can’t, not anymore. I keep hearing women complaining about men. They complain how badly men treat them, how terribly guys behave towards them, wha...

How To Say Goodbye To the Old Year?
My goodbye to the year that has just ended usually takes on a form of a few hour session with myself. What I usually do is I take my list of goals I set for myself at the beginning of the year to di...

What Does It Mean To Be a True Gentleman
One of my male friends sent me an article arguing that chivalry is not dead and that there are true gentlemen out there who would “make us melt”. The article presented us with 9 things t...

How do I conquer fear?
Fear rules our lives, whether you want to admit it or not. All of your decisions are based on fear. All of your choices are rooted in your fears. You don’t apply for a j...

Step 51- What does it take for you to understand what it’s all about?
I just finished Tim Ferriss’ book, “Tribe of Mentors,” and one of the people featured in his book is a woman named Turia Pitt. I haven’t looked up every p...

Step 50 - Slow Down (Daga). Speed Detox
I just had a few days off. And I was so excited about these days off that I have been coming up with different ideas on how to spend them. I had new ideas almost every day before that week finall...

What changed in me after Tony Robbins’ workshops?
  In March 2016, I attended Tony Robbins’ Unleash the Power workshops. I wasn’t going to write about it at all, since I didn’t know what people would think, ...

When I know you’re not a New Yorker?
  I think I’m becoming an expert at recognizing real New Yorkers. What do I mean by that? I love watching people, taking notice of their behaviors and habits. That means I watch New Yo...

“I’m Not…”…? I say It’s Bullshit
I think that many people have no idea how important it is to pay attention the words you use. I believe I have written about that on Just Like NY already, but it’s important to keep talking abo...

Body – dangerous field
This is a difficult topic, but I still want to write about it: body and body image. We all know how the media treats our bodies and what kind of body image is presented to us. I’ve written about...

Step 49 - What’s Your Next Step After You’ve Failed?
My spinning instructor keeps saying: “It’s not important what you do when you’re strong; the most important thing is what you do when you have no strength at all”. And every...

Step 50 - Slow Down (Daga). Speed Detox

added: 2017-12-09 , category: Transform Yourself

I just had a few days off. And I was so excited about these days off that I have been coming up with different ideas on how to spend them. I had new ideas almost every day before that week finally arrived. And when it arrived… I froze. I was shocked by my body reaction, but it actually froze. Instead of relaxing, I caught myself being tense. I don’t remember having a week off for myself in NY – I don’t think it ever happened so far. So when it finally did happen, I …just got confused. And it took me a few days to realize what caused my reaction.

Usually when I have a few days off, I go somewhere. That means that I keep my mind occupied, since all my senses are awake and ready to explore. But this time I stayed in the environment I know, I wasn’t exposed to new experiences. I live in NY, so I can experience something new every day, of course, but in general – I stayed at the same apartment, I used the same subway system, I even went to the same places and met with the same people; that means that nothing changed overall. And I realized that my body is not used to being idle in NY. It’s not used to slowing down. I always liked a fast pace of living and I like to keep myself busy and active. I just really like being “productive” – and it was always like that. I thought I changed the past two years though, but apparently I haven’t and that’s something that hit me really hard lately. I don’t only keep myself busy, but I think I even speeded up without noticing that. It took me two days to change my approach. I decided that instead of making the list I had prepared for myself in my head, I will just simply… do nothing. Including not even working out (and I usually work out 4 times a week). After two days, I started noticing that my body was letting go, and that the tension was going down. I was going to coffee shops, watching people, meeting my friends – every day a different person – and writing. After five days on my “speed detox”, I finally felt relaxed. My body did let go.

The entire experience made me think. Because of my pace, I’m sure I’m missing out on many things. But not only that – I exhaust my body, which all the time is trying to keep up with me. It doesn’t mean that I will completely zen out right now, but something has to change. And it’s not because this lifestyle doesn’t make me happy. It does – I wouldn’t live that way if it didn’t make me smile. Something has to change, because I don’t think it’s natural to have your mind spin around all the time, or to feel guilty every time you sit down and don’t do anything. And this is how I always feel when I let myself loosen up.  Yes, I am ambitious, and I want to achieve great things, but I think that there is a better way to do it. I finally understood that those days when I don’t do anything are just as important as the days when I have full speed ahead and work for 14 hours straight. I realized that a day shouldn’t be considered “a good day” just because it was productive. Here is the alignment that reveled itself to me: we do need both kind of days, these “lazy” and the productive ones. They are equally important and necessary. Our bodies and minds can’t constantly run and move forward; they have to stop and reflect once in a while. Otherwise you will always feel this huge gap within you that you would desperately try to fill up. You can’t fill it up if you’re constantly chasing the void. You have to slow down. I have to slow down. I thought that having my hour of not doing anything in a coffee shop once or twice a week would be enough. No, it’s not. It doesn’t mean that I suddenly stop working or working out, I just have to be more careful with what I want my life to be. And I want mine to be full – and that, to me, means: balanced. I know that all these achievers say to push harder, to work harder, to thrive, but you know what…? I think I prefer to have a longer journey to my goal and be happy about it, than to die on a finish line.   



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