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Step 61 - Find Your Lifestyle
As I said in one of my recent posts – the world has changed and the way we live has changed. I honestly think it’s time to reevaluate some ideas and solutions about the life we want to l...

Do you even want to get married?
I’ve been thinking a lot about marriage recently (not about my own), because suddenly I spend a lot of time talking to married guys (just as friends). And I started to come...

What Does It Mean To Be Successful? My Five Years In NYC
It’s been five years since I decided to live in NY. These were five difficult years, and yet ones filled many amazing moments and great people I’ve met along the way. But five years i...

Step 60 - What Does It Really Mean To Leave Your Comfort Zone?
“Leaving the comfort zone” became a very common phrase these past few years. It is associated with the idea of breaking free from the life you’ve had so far – with sta...

Choose Your Own Relationship
I’m single so – naturally – I do think about guys and relationships. I’ve been thinking a lot of what type of a guy would actually make me want to be in a relationship. An...

Step 59 - How Many (Facebook) Friends Do You Need?
  I remember when Facebook first came into our lives, we were all kind of proud of the fact that our friend count was growing. The more there is social media in our lives, th...

Step 58 - Are You Able To Let Your Old Self Go?
I’m lucky enough to have a few friends whom I can share my fears, tears and happy moments with. These are friends with whom I can go through any emotional rollercoaster. It’s very...

What’s The Best Dating Advice?
  There are plenty of advisors on the dating scene – there are videos and articles about every aspect of dating, with all these great pieces of advice: “What to do on a date,&rd...

Step 57 - What You Really Need Is A Connection…With Yourself
I lead a life that I didn’t expect to be leading right now. (No, I’m not a princess living in a castle.) Six months ago, I decided not to have internet in my apartment. I have it on my p...

Step 56 - Getting You Off The Hook.
I’ve done some thinking recently and tried to figure out the basic way people come up with an excuse. It’s a broad topic, but I’ve mostly experienced one response from variety o...

Williamsburg Is Over
Summer’s almost here, so I decided to take a walk in Williamsburg, and it just reassured me that… thinks are really over for this neighborhood. I moved to Greenpoint (a sister neighb...

Where is love?
  Love has been on my mind recently (and probably has been unconsciously for a while now) and I started thinking about where to find it. I know it’s a pretty odd thing (...

Step 46 – Be patient

added: 2017-10-24 , category: Transform Yourself

If someone asked me to choose only one thing as my most valuable lesson NY taught me, it would have to be – being patient. I’m so happy I finally learned this very difficult (for me) skill.

I’ve always had problems with this. I’ve always been very impatient. I couldn’t wait a minute, I had to have it now, right away. It took me many years and many painful lessons to finally understand one crucial thing – I don’t have to get everything I want right away. You don’t have to get everything right away, either. 

There is a reason why you’re supposed to wait for certain things. There is a reason why it has to be a process sometimes. I understand that we’re living in a world of fast solutions, where everything is instant and it’s delivered at practically the very moment we ask for it. But it happens that life doesn’t work like way. You can’t constantly get what you want, just because you want it. I want many things, but I realized that I have to wait for them. I don’t think I deserve them right now. If I got them, just because I have this desire to have them, I wouldn’t appreciate them. Think about it. Aren’t you prouder of things that you accomplished after you put in a lot of work? What do you value most? A trip, a car, books,  a laptop, a camera that you saved money for and that you had to work your ass off for, or the same things that were just given to you? 

I’ve mentioned on Just Like NY already that I started learning to surf (and yes, I saved money for that myself and sacrificed a few things to get it – like living by myself) and that it was teaching me patience, too. Surfing has shown me that just because you think you’re able to surf by yourself, just because you bought a wetsuit and a board and you have time on Saturday morning, it doesn’t mean you’ll be surfing that day. Yes, you are ready, but the ocean might not be. Just because you want to surf doesn’t mean you’ll get the waves that you want. You might get one or two, or five if you’re very lucky, but you might also get none. I was frustrated a few times, but then I understood – it’s not time yet. I’d keep coming back, though, waiting for that perfect day when the ocean would allow me to surf as many waves as I wanted. And I was sure that I’d really appreciate them more then

One day I didn’t catch any waves, but there was sun shining, and suddenly I saw dolphins swimming around us. Was I angry that I didn’t surf that day? Not at all, because I had a beautiful day in company of dolphins in the oceanSometimes you get what you need, not what you think you want. And sometimes it’s better to wait, because you might want something that you actually don’t even need. 

So please, be patient and wait it out.

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