Just like NY



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Step 61 - Find Your Lifestyle
As I said in one of my recent posts – the world has changed and the way we live has changed. I honestly think it’s time to reevaluate some ideas and solutions about the life we want to l...

Do you even want to get married?
I’ve been thinking a lot about marriage recently (not about my own), because suddenly I spend a lot of time talking to married guys (just as friends). And I started to come...

What Does It Mean To Be Successful? My Five Years In NYC
It’s been five years since I decided to live in NY. These were five difficult years, and yet ones filled many amazing moments and great people I’ve met along the way. But five years i...

Step 60 - What Does It Really Mean To Leave Your Comfort Zone?
“Leaving the comfort zone” became a very common phrase these past few years. It is associated with the idea of breaking free from the life you’ve had so far – with sta...

Choose Your Own Relationship
I’m single so – naturally – I do think about guys and relationships. I’ve been thinking a lot of what type of a guy would actually make me want to be in a relationship. An...

Step 59 - How Many (Facebook) Friends Do You Need?
  I remember when Facebook first came into our lives, we were all kind of proud of the fact that our friend count was growing. The more there is social media in our lives, th...

Step 58 - Are You Able To Let Your Old Self Go?
I’m lucky enough to have a few friends whom I can share my fears, tears and happy moments with. These are friends with whom I can go through any emotional rollercoaster. It’s very...

What’s The Best Dating Advice?
  There are plenty of advisors on the dating scene – there are videos and articles about every aspect of dating, with all these great pieces of advice: “What to do on a date,&rd...

Step 57 - What You Really Need Is A Connection…With Yourself
I lead a life that I didn’t expect to be leading right now. (No, I’m not a princess living in a castle.) Six months ago, I decided not to have internet in my apartment. I have it on my p...

Step 56 - Getting You Off The Hook.
I’ve done some thinking recently and tried to figure out the basic way people come up with an excuse. It’s a broad topic, but I’ve mostly experienced one response from variety o...

Williamsburg Is Over
Summer’s almost here, so I decided to take a walk in Williamsburg, and it just reassured me that… thinks are really over for this neighborhood. I moved to Greenpoint (a sister neighb...

Where is love?
  Love has been on my mind recently (and probably has been unconsciously for a while now) and I started thinking about where to find it. I know it’s a pretty odd thing (...

Step 45 – You Decide

added: 2017-10-22 , category: Transform Yourself

I recently watched a baking show on Netflix. It’s not that I’m a baker now (in fact, it’ been a while since I baked), but I love sweets and I love creative and passionate people (that’s the reason I also watch The Voice every season). I watched it just because I didn’t want to feel guilty eating ice cream. And there was one thing that struck me. The contest on the show was a great mirror of life.

You get a group of people, all from different backgrounds, with different pasts and different dreams (except for the one they share: to win a show), and you give them the same set of tools. And what’s surprising – everyone ends up with a different result. You give them the same ingredients, the same kitchenware, the same conditions and the same exact time – and there is no chance they will end up with the same cake. Some of them will make a great cake (but not a similar one, they won’t look or taste alike) and some of them will fail. If you didn’t measure your time right, if you overestimate or underestimate the conditions you were granted – you will fail.

And that’s how life works, even though some of you still want to argue about it. We all have the same tools, but we all make different choices. And so our lives look so different.  I wanted a different lifestyle, so I gathered money that would help me to survive for a month and left. That was my choice that I don’t cry about, even when it gets really difficult. I don’t blame anyone; it was something I decided to do, so I can only blame myself. If I fail, it’s only on me. But if I win, it’s also on me. It’s not “luck”; it’s the amount of faith and work I put in. Every decision changes your life. Every decision shapes your life – being in this relationship, taking this job, buying this house, buying a car or living abroad. All that changes the current of your life. And these decisions are on you, as are the consequences. If you don’t like them and you’re constantly complaining, put your ass down and think about a different choice that will bring a different solution.

 

What I’m trying to say is – before you say that something is “so difficult”, “impossible”, “not for you”; that someone “is lucky”, look in the mirror and realize that what you just said is garbage. It’s a garbage pile of  false conclusions. As I said at the beginning – we all get very similar (if not the same) tools. And now there is this decision to make – which direction I am choosing to go? Don’t look at others. What’s your decision…? Chasing your dreams is fucking scary and it’s very difficult, but the problem is that there is no easy way to find out if you can make your dreams your reality. You always get a choice – you’re going left or right, or straight or are you turning back again? You just have to decide, on your own with the full understanding that you’re responsible for every choice and that means you’re responsible for the way your life looks like now. 



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