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How Many (Facebook) Friends Do You Need?
I remember when Facebook first came into our lives, we were all kind of proud of the fact that our friend count was growing. The more there is social media in our lives, the more I real...

Are You Able To Let Your Old Self Go?
I’m lucky enough to have a few friends whom I can share my fears, tears and happy moments with. These are friends with whom I can go through any emotional rollercoaster. It’s very i...

What’s The Best Dating Advice?
There are plenty of advisors on the dating scene – there are videos and articles about every aspect of dating, with all these great pieces of advice: “What to do on a date,” “W...

What You Really Need Is A Connection…With Yourself
I lead a life that I didn’t expect to be leading right now. (No, I’m not a princess living in a castle.) Six months ago, I decided not to have internet in my apartment. I have it on my pho...

Getting You Off The Hook.
I’ve done some thinking recently and tried to figure out the basic way people come up with an excuse. It’s a broad topic, but I’ve mostly experienced one response from variety of ...

Williamsburg Is Over
Summer’s almost here, so I decided to take a walk in Williamsburg, and it just reassured me that… thinks are really over for this neighborhood. I moved to Greenpoint (a sister neighbor...

Where is love?
Love has been on my mind recently (and probably has been unconsciously for a while now) and I started thinking about where to find it. I know it’s a pretty odd thing (you can&rsqu...

It’s Your Man Or...Your Girlfriend?
I recently noticed a very scary pattern, and I’m wondering what is causing it. I’ve noticed that women are a bit lost and confused as to what kind of partner they want to have by thei...

Should I Dump Him?
I was just sitting in the sauna at my gym last week, and I couldn’t help but overheard the conversation of two women around my age (even though I was trying very hard to focus on the guys in spe...

We all pretend it’s normal…
We all pretend that life in NY is normal. Just today I had the day off, which isn’t usually for a Thursday, and I decided to go to the gym before noon. I got on a train at 10am and...

What If I Told You That You Can Have a Different Life?
I know I will sound very naïve now, but I had a recent revelation I would like to share with you. I started thinking about the choices we make and why we actually make them. Those who have rea...

Poor Rich Kids
I have mentioned money in NYC on Just Like NY a few times already. There is a lot of money here, and people spend lots of it on a variety of weird and stupid things sometimes....

Step 39: The Map of Happiness

added: 2017-08-22 , category: Transform Yourself

Do you think that something like a map of happiness really exists…? I believe it does. I just watched an interview (on Impact Theory again; which is the YouTube channel I mentioned you a few times before: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8CD2QEYo6Q) with Vanessa Edwards, the scientist whose book “Captivate” is a bestseller right now (can’t wait to read it!). She is working on a new book about happiness and already said that we can easily expand our own. She says that the moments of real, big-scale happiness don’t happen that often in our lives, but what really matters are those small happy moments that happen to us on a daily basis that we don’t even notice (like drinking our favorite coffee or making breakfast for our loved ones). Those are the moments we should be celebrating and that we should also have more of in our lives.

How we can do that? It’s easier than I thought it’d be, and yet it never occurred to me to do it. Edwards simply advises us to write down what we do every day. To write down everything. Starting with our morning routine, breakfast, work, chores, hobbies – everything. And then, after you write it all down, she asks you to rank the stuff from 1 to 10. 1 means that the thing brings you the least amount of happiness;  10 is the happiest of course. Why she asks you to do that? Because this list will help you to realize what really makes you happy and what gets you down. After you understand what puts smile on your face, it will be easier for you to incorporate these things into your life. Isn’t that simple and brilliant at the same time…?

I said it never occurred to me, but now I realized that it actually did, a year ago. I remember I got dizzy, because of all the expectations I set out for myself – and one day I just went to Argo Tea, sat down for 2 hours and started thinking of what was missing from my life. I wrote down things that always made me happy and that I stopped doing for some reason. Going to the movies, reading magazines and exploring NY were three top things on that list. And after I wrote it all down, I promised myself to do exactly those things at least once a week. And now I’m doing them again – and that makes me really happy.

I will make the list Venessa advised us to do, just out of curiosity. I wanted to see what I should avoid doing and what should be on my weekly to-do list. Why? Because, as I said a few times already on Just Like NY, we all think “we still have time” and we put off the things that are important to us on a shelf, always waiting for the “right day” to arrive. Well, guess what: It arrived right now. How about living like it was our last week/month/year on this planet…? Just do it, before it gets too late. 



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