Twitter Facebook Instagram Szukaj Newsletter Kontakt Wersja polska

About me | My projects | My products | Contact

Contact with me
justlikeny@gmail.com

Zapisz się do newslettera





Williamsburg Is Over
Summer’s almost here, so I decided to take a walk in Williamsburg, and it just reassured me that… thinks are really over for this neighborhood. I moved to Greenpoint (a sister neighbor...

Where is love?
Love has been on my mind recently (and probably has been unconsciously for a while now) and I started thinking about where to find it. I know it’s a pretty odd thing (you can&rsqu...

It’s Your Man Or...Your Girlfriend?
I recently noticed a very scary pattern, and I’m wondering what is causing it. I’ve noticed that women are a bit lost and confused as to what kind of partner they want to have by thei...

Should I Dump Him?
I was just sitting in the sauna at my gym last week, and I couldn’t help but overheard the conversation of two women around my age (even though I was trying very hard to focus on the guys in spe...

We all pretend it’s normal…
We all pretend that life in NY is normal. Just today I had the day off, which isn’t usually for a Thursday, and I decided to go to the gym before noon. I got on a train at 10am and...

What If I Told You That You Can Have a Different Life?
I know I will sound very naïve now, but I had a recent revelation I would like to share with you. I started thinking about the choices we make and why we actually make them. Those who have rea...

Poor Rich Kids
I have mentioned money in NYC on Just Like NY a few times already. There is a lot of money here, and people spend lots of it on a variety of weird and stupid things sometimes....

Do You Want To Be Famous?
Because I’ve been living here for almost five years now, I tend to forget what kind of place NYC is. It’s where fantasy keeps meeting reality. The longer you live here, the more “...

Double Standard – Why Are Women Treated Differently?
I had a situation that I wrote about on Facebook, but I want to write more about it, because there is more to it.  So there was a guy, a customer of mine who I had met maybe three times, who&n...

Why Having a Boyfriend Will Not Make You Happy?
When I was a teenage girl (that is one week ago… just kidding), my biggest dream was to have a boyfriend. Especially since a weekly column called “Love Story” from “Bravo&r...

What Happens Once You Stop Caring If People Like You?
What happens once you stop caring if people like you…? It’s simple – your life starts changing. Yes, it’s that huge. One day I realized that it happened to me – that ...

Men and Sex
What is it that men want when it comes to sex…? The thing is: they want to have everything. Including a virgin. That’s the funniest part. I didn’t have a lot of sex in my life (c...

Step 36 - Be a Doer

added: 2017-07-30 , category: Transform Yourself

There is this great app ad on the subway that always makes me smile. It says: “In doers we trust”. And I always think the same thing: “Yes, it’s always up to the doers”. If there weren’t people who decide to do something – instead of sitting and giving up – nothing would ever change.

I want to become a doer. I want to be that person who actually moves one’s ass and makes some changes. First in myself, then in things around that are not right. 

To be a doer, for me, also means to be responsible for one’s own words. A doer is someone who does things they said they’d do. And it starts in everyday life. I want to be that person, too. What do I mean by that…? It’s simple – do what you said you’d do. It starts with basic things – you promised to send an e-mail, send the information, go for a coffee, call back, meet for a dinner… so do it. Don’t say it just in order to say it. If you’re not planning on doing it – don’t promise that. It not only makes people think that they can’t rely on you, but you also put a burden on yourself.

I’m not an angel when it comes to that: I did promise things several times, then I forgot about it and didn’t end up doing those things. I must say I got better though, because I want to be considered as someone who keeps promises. I’m still not perfect, but at least I stopped promising things that I know I wouldn’t be able to complete. We all know this situation – someone asks you to “grab a coffee one day” and you say yes, even though you really don’t want to do it. Why you even say yes then…? To be nice…? You give someone hope and you give yourself a headache, because then you will spend many hours figuring out how to avoid this situation. You’d waste so much energy on that! And you could have avoided all of that by simply saying “No” right away. Just be honest, especially with yourself. Just say “No”, in order not to bother yourself with the issue anymore. You think you’re being nice by agreeing on things you don’t want to do, because you don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings. Maybe at that moment you’re nice, but you won’t be nice later on coming up with excuses. Don’t be nice, be yourself. You don’t have to say: “I don’t want to see you”, you can just simply say: “I just know my mind will be taken up with other stuff, so I don’t want to promise you something that I can’t keep”. The subject gets closed with one sentence. This person will be disappointed for a minute, but then they will appreciate the fact that you didn’t waste their time, either.

 

Not everyone was born a doer, but it’s a skill that you can learn – is the matter of practice. It’s not easy and it requires you to be consistent, but once you get it, your life becomes easier. You will stop distracting yourself with unnecessary things. You become more focused on things that matter to you and that will help you to accomplish more. And this is what doers do. The decision who you want to become is only up to you. 



Your comments

comments powered by Disqus