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justlikeny@gmail.com

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Accept the challenge
Until now, my favorite sentence was always: “Hope he’ll change after we get married.” (Yeah,  sure, into a pumpkin…) But there is a new contender that I find equally ...

NY Love Story A.D. 2019
I don’t like romantic comedies. And I can tell you why. Once, it used to be my favorite genre, but I grew up since then (a bit). Also — I moved to NY. Romantic comedies just don’t ...

When Was the Last Time Your Journal Embarrassed You?
When was the last time you said to yourself: “This is embarrassing”, and you actually meant yourself…? Well, it just happened to me. I sat down to write about something else and I...

Why It’s Important To Not Look Like Shit
Here is my question: Why do you think it’s a good idea to look like shit at home? Some people put on their worst clothes at home - clothes with holes, stretched out, worn out, old and ugly. (B...

You Have to Kiss a Lot of Frogs To… Find the Frog That Rises to Your Standards
I’ve had a few men in my life so far, and they always disappeared at some point (nowadays, I realize that they actually did me a favor). Once, I used to think it was the end of the world, but ...

You Have To Punch Back
There is a saying in NY: If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere. And there is a reason for that. I always say that a relationship with this city is like a relationship with an abusive boy...

Why Does Time Have Value
I recently noticed that I’m able to guess how long a person have lived in NYC. It’s not that I know the exact number of years, but I can recognize if someone has been living here for jus...

Wait For the Understanding Nod
I recently chatted on Instagram with a guy (we haven’t met in real life, he just saw my photos on social media) and he said this thing, and I quote: “How come you’re still single? ...

Step 63 - It’s All About Priorities
I know a guy in NY who doesn’t like to spend money on a cup of coffee. He doesn’t understand why anyone would spend $6 on a cup of coffee when you can pay $15 for a whole bag. But at the...

“The Top Five Regrets of Dying” - Regret Number One
This is a continuation of my posts about Bronnie Ware’s “The Top Five Regrets of Dying,” this being the last one. I wrote about Regret Numbers Five, Four, Three and Two here. Regr...

Love is Born
I watched “A Star is born” recently and can’t stop thinking about this movie.  It’s a story that has been told in Hollywood many times already: that of a seasoned mus...

Just Like NY on UrbanCreativiti-tea.com!
I'm happy to have a guest apperance on Urban Creativi-tea! Thank you for having me! It's an honor!  If you're looking for any (fashion) inspiration check them out http://urbancreativi-tea.c...

What Does It Mean To Be Successful? My Five Years In NYC

added: 2018-08-01 , category: Living in NY

It’s been five years since I decided to live in NY. These were five difficult years, and yet ones filled many amazing moments and great people I’ve met along the way. But five years is quite some time to achieve something. I believe that there are some people who would want to ask me: “Ok, so are you successful already?”. And I would answer: “Yes, I am”. But I don’t think they would even understand what I’m talking about.

If you looked at my bank account right now, there is nothing special there to see (yet). If you look at my so-called career – not much is going on in that department, either. Yes, I do various stuff, but I’m not yet where I want to be, so we can’t call it “a career”. I didn’t marry a rich guy and I don’t live in an expensive house, either. So: had I got all of these things, you would probably consider me a successful woman, right? But since I don’t have them, who am I in your eyes…?

I don’t know what you think of me. Not that I care, but in my opinion I’m very successful right now. And I can tell you why. I was able to survive five years in NY, with some help coming from my amazing friends – so there are two successful things in my life already. I live by myself and don’t have to worry about money for rent – another two things. I have a job that doesn’t stress me out at all and helps me meeting new people – another two things. I have friends who are not tired of me (yet) and a family that supports me – another two things. But most importantly – I don’t pretend that I’m someone else. I wake up in the morning, dress as I want to, barely put some make up on my face – and walk outside (at 6:00 AM) smiling. And at my work I just have to be myself – they hired me saying: “Just be Daga”. And that’s who I am. But it doesn’t matter where I am anymore – at work, at home, on the street, talking to my parents or friends, or to people I’ve just met – I’m just myself. I don’t do things I don’t like, I speak my mind, I’m open about what I like and what I don’t like. I’m honest about my desires and about the life I want to have. I’m not trying to fit in. I don’t crave anybody’s friendship or attention. I don’t feel the need to impress anyone. I don’t try to belong anywhere and I am far from wondering what’s your opinion on my life or my looks. I’m cured. I don’t try being someone else just to make other people happy (including my closest ones). I also stopped carrying the burden of “what life I was supposed to have”. And it’s a humongous success to me. I do belong to myself.

Every year I make a summary of another year living abroad. And I can honestly say that now, after five years, I finally got to the happiest place – I’m at peace with myself. It took me many difficult months, much hope and a whole lot of courage, but I finally got there. It was worth it; all this struggle was worth the place I got to right now. It’s the biggest success I could wish for myself. So next time when you think of “being successful”, think first what does that REALLY mean to you. What’s your definition of success? And if your answer is by any chance:  “Money”, I’d suggest you think again, and this time do it clearly for a change. For me, it’s simply being finally myself. And I believe that because of that, everything else will fall into the right place.

What would your successful life look like? Think carefully and start making a plan how you can get there.



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