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Don’t judge by the chapter you walked into.
It’s a new year, so I want you to change one thing. I would say “we,” but I’ve already been working on it the last two years (not that I’ve mastered it yet). Don’...

Why Some Women Don’t Want to Have Kids (And Why the Reason Is Not What You Think It Is)
Yes, I want to write about it (again), because it bothers me. I recently realized I don’t want to have kids (now and maybe ever). And I realized how difficult it is for a woman not only to adm...

You’re Fine
2018 has been a very successful year for me, because I finally understand that I’m completely fine. I just look at myself and I finally see myself. It took me half my life to understand it, bu...

It’s Profound to Be Understood
As Whoopi Goldberg said in her book „If He Says: ‚You complete me’ — Run!”, which I’ve already written about on JLNY some time ago, people tend to mistake love fo...

You’re Always Becoming
Michelle Obama released her book memoir, „Becoming”, and I keep seeing it everywhere in NYC. I haven’t read it yet and now I really want to. Not because I consider Barack Obam...

Drop This Attitude
I just had my best friend Gosia visited me from Chicago a few weeks ago. We spent the whole weekend together excited about each other. We did a few activities, but what was the most important was th...

Is Your Partner’s Skin Color or Country of Origin Relevant At All?
I will answer the titular question right away: „I don’t think so”. And I’m pretty sure I am right. I honestly don’t understand this whole theory about having a partner ...

How To Get the Body You Want
Have you ever said to yourself: “I’m so fat”…? Or “I can’t even look at myself”…?. Or “I will never lose all this weight”…? Or &l...

Accept the challenge
Until now, my favorite sentence was always: “Hope he’ll change after we get married.” (Yeah,  sure, into a pumpkin…) But there is a new contender that I find equally ...

NY Love Story A.D. 2019
I don’t like romantic comedies. And I can tell you why. Once, it used to be my favorite genre, but I grew up since then (a bit). Also — I moved to NY. Romantic comedies just don’t ...

When Was the Last Time Your Journal Embarrassed You?
When was the last time you said to yourself: “This is embarrassing”, and you actually meant yourself…? Well, it just happened to me. I sat down to write about something else and I...

Why It’s Important To Not Look Like Shit
Here is my question: Why do you think it’s a good idea to look like shit at home? Some people put on their worst clothes at home - clothes with holes, stretched out, worn out, old and ugly. (B...

Body – dangerous field

added: 2017-11-29 , category: Living in NY

This is a difficult topic, but I still want to write about it: body and body image. We all know how the media treats our bodies and what kind of body image is presented to us. I’ve written about that on Just Like NY already. I really don’t like these Photoshopped bodies. I don’t like how they make us feel. I wish that using Photoshop to transform someone’s body was banned. 

I don’t like the idea of bodies made skinny with computers; I like when they’re made skinnier by working out. Yes, I’m a fan of taking care of the body. I like bodies with muscles, because I simply associate them with health.

 

When you work out, everything changes. I’ve written about that on Just Like NY already as well. Your body changes, of course, but your approach to life changes, too - the way you make your decisions, even the way you look at people. That’s why I’m such a huge believer that you can change your life when you start changing your body and what goes along with that – your mindset. 


I’ll always root for accepting yourself regardless of your weight or look. But I root more for working on yourself to improve. Work on your self-love, work on self-acceptance and work on your health equally hard. Why I am saying that? There is a new trend in the US now to have bigger models on runways. And it’s great that we don’t want only one type of body anymore. It would be amazing to see different sizes on runways around the globe, because women don’t all look alike. Even if the size is the same, we just look different. We have different shapes, different weights and different body types. 

And even though I want the fashion industry to showcase everything, I must say that I don’t like glorifying overweight bodies. Yes, everyone is beautiful, but it doesn’t mean that everyone is healthy. And if you’re more than 50 pounds overweight, it’s not about beauty anymore, it’s about health. I know that there are women who feel great being bigger, and that there are men who love bigger women. That’s great, but let’s not suddenly put them on a pedestal and say that, “it’s all about beauty and how you feel.” I disagree - it’s about being healthy. Your health influences not only you, but your family too. If you care about your family, you should start caring about your health, that means includes weight. 


I’m just afraid that this new trend will encourage women to not to change anything, to look for excuses like “big is beautiful” and to simply give up. I believe we can do better. I don’t believe that women will suddenly be happy being plus-sized just because they see bigger models on billboards. They might feel better about themselves for a bit because finally no one points out their weight, but ultimately being overweight will not make them happier. I would bet money (any amount of money!) that if you took a woman who says she is happy being a size 25 and showed her a visualization where she’s a size 8 or less, she would choose the smaller size. I have no doubt about it. Not a single doubt!


I’m strongly against calling someone names just because they’re overweight. I used to make remarks like that myself, but now I have more respect for people, because, as I said recently, you never know what a person is going through in their life. Don’t let anyone put you down because of your weight – oh, hell no! Don’t postpone your life and happiness until “after you lose these 40 pounds” – hell no! But as soon as you start building your self-love, start working on your physical health, too. Because, once again, it’s all about your health and how it influences your life. You can be big and happy, I have no doubt about that, but I can guarantee you that you’d just be a completely different person if you got rid of those extra pounds that make you not even want to look in the mirror. I can guarantee you that you’d be way happier as this new person you’d become. And that amazing feeling when you go into a fitting room and everything looks good on you, that’s just something extra.



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