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It’s Your Man Or...Your Girlfriend?
I recently noticed a very scary pattern, and I’m wondering what is causing it. I’ve noticed that women are a bit lost and confused as to what kind of partner they want to have by thei...

Should I Dump Him?
I was just sitting in the sauna at my gym last week, and I couldn’t help but overheard the conversation of two women around my age (even though I was trying very hard to focus on the guys in spe...

We all pretend it’s normal…
We all pretend that life in NY is normal. Just today I had the day off, which isn’t usually for a Thursday, and I decided to go to the gym before noon. I got on a train at 10am and...

What If I Told You That You Can Have a Different Life?
I know I will sound very naïve now, but I had a recent revelation I would like to share with you. I started thinking about the choices we make and why we actually make them. Those who have rea...

Poor Rich Kids
I have mentioned money in NYC on Just Like NY a few times already. There is a lot of money here, and people spend lots of it on a variety of weird and stupid things sometimes....

Do You Want To Be Famous?
Because I’ve been living here for almost five years now, I tend to forget what kind of place NYC is. It’s where fantasy keeps meeting reality. The longer you live here, the more “...

Double Standard – Why Are Women Treated Differently?
I had a situation that I wrote about on Facebook, but I want to write more about it, because there is more to it.  So there was a guy, a customer of mine who I had met maybe three times, who&n...

Why Having a Boyfriend Will Not Make You Happy?
When I was a teenage girl (that is one week ago… just kidding), my biggest dream was to have a boyfriend. Especially since a weekly column called “Love Story” from “Bravo&r...

What Happens Once You Stop Caring If People Like You?
What happens once you stop caring if people like you…? It’s simple – your life starts changing. Yes, it’s that huge. One day I realized that it happened to me – that ...

Men and Sex
What is it that men want when it comes to sex…? The thing is: they want to have everything. Including a virgin. That’s the funniest part. I didn’t have a lot of sex in my life (c...

The Most Annoying American Family
I must say, I’m so fed up with these fake images and fake lives that are all over social media now. And there is one family that makes me especially angry. You’ve p...

Step 53 - Do You Have A Choice?
I believe I have already written about what I am about to say in this post, but I’ll be coming back to the subject, because it’s really important. I notice more and more often that we ge...

My Four Years in NY

added: 2017-07-27 , category: Living in NY

Four years in NY passed for me almost two months ago. Four years is a lot to live abroad. Every year I do a summary of what I’ve learned during yet another year. This past one was amazing, to be sure. It started with Tony Robbins’ workshop and all those changes that have been going through me. I have put a lot of work to change some of my habits, my mind and my body. Meanwhile, there was life going on in NY.

Now, after these four years, I feel much more confident. I’m definitely not the same person I was in 2013 when I came here. I remember that I was thinking that someone would help me “to make it work” and now I know the only person who could help me was myself. In NY no one will do anything for you unless they see you try and work for it. I don’t want to write about how difficult it is to live abroad, without your family, without your language, friends and things that are familiar again, because I wrote about it on Just Like NY a few times already.

Now living here is easier for me. It doesn’t mean that life got easier – it just mean I learnt to navigate this life more efficiently. Things are as difficult as they were, but my attitude changed. Instead of obstacles, I see opportunities. I try to take advantage of my disadvantages. And I can see that I am making progress. It is a slow process, but the most important thing is that I’m moving forward. My most valuable lesson after these 4 years? Probably this: You want something? WORK FOR IT! WORK FUCKING HARD FOR IT. It’s so easy to be jealous of someone’s happiness, relationships, trips, saying “Oh, you’re lucky”. Fuck, no. I’m not “lucky”. I worked my ass off for what I have. The real question is: What are you willing to sacrifice…? People here often give up after a few months, because “it’s not how they imagined it”. Of course it’s not. It’s way, way more difficult.  That’s why I take big pride in what I’ve achieved, but also: in all my mistakes and failures along the way. That’s why I love this sentence: Don’t worry if you failed, failing means trying. I’m still not where I want to be, but I so see a bright future for myself. Not because my ego is huge (oh no, NY taught me to be humble) or because I’m big noise, but because I know I will work for it. I can work hard and am able to sacrifice, because I know there is no other way.

After these 4 years, I also am not able to stand people who complain (I wrote about it already) and those who think that they can impose their opinions about your life and your choices. If anyone says something like “You just got lucky” or “You’re just showing off” to me, or will think that my Just Like NY blog is here just to show you guys how amazing I’m doing, I swear, I will respond with: “Fuck you”. How comfortable it is to sit in front of your computer (or with your smartphone in your hand), complain that other people’s lives are better (and it’s usually not better, it’s just different) and judge people who made different choices that you did…? As I said a few posts before – different doesn’t mean better. And the fact something’s better for me doesn’t mean it has to be better for you. My website and my mission are here to prove to you guys that you can really have what you always dreamt of – but it will not come easy and will not happen overnight.

My biggest lesson, though, after the fourth year here, is being honest with myself. And this is what I would advise you - Take an honest look at yourself. When you stand in front of the mirror, are you really able to say: I did everything what I could to get what/where I wanted? If not, stop spending some much time on social media looking at other people’s lives. Instead, go after your life and after what you truly desire. It will set you free. Not only because you will get to the place that simply feels good, but you will get rid of the bitterness towards others and their choices. And this will make you just a better person. 



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