Looking For Sex

Because of a certain world-famous TV show, the word “sex” is one of the first ones to enter your mind when you think of NYC. But what’s the truth of it? The truth is exactly as seen on TV. I already wrote at Just Like NY of the dating sites, but in fact, you don’t even need them to pleasantly spend your night over here. Or a day. Or a day, and then a night. All you need to do is walk into a bar.

I once went to The Groove club in West Village to listen to a friend of mine sing, and it wasn’t even a minute before the first guy approached me, offering a drink. At another time, when I decided to linger at Le Bain club a little bit after my friends went away, I counted no less than five different men (of varying nationalities and levels of hotness), who were trying to convince me their company was a better option than dancing by myself. At still another occasion, I and my female friend went to the Fat Baby club in Lower East Side, and all we needed to do was to go to the restroom and back again in order to get noticed. The second we arrived at the bar (seemingly joking about how we can’t pay for our drinks any longer), we immediately heard two guys asking us what would we like to drink.

In order to meet someone in New York, all you need to do is to enter a bar with a smile on your face. It doesn’t matter how you look like, what’s your size, shade or color. I often see a group of guys at a bar, whose conversation suddenly slows down the second a girl walks into a bar. Their heads all start to turn her way. Usually, the brave one emerges and starts to speak to the girl in a few minutes, with the others passively and enviously looking on. In the case of two girls walking into a bar, the process is the same, but it takes a bit longer. The guys need some more time to figure out a strategy in those cases. It may also happen that you pass the guys’ table and you will simply be asked to join them instead of returning home. It works the other way around, too: I witnessed situations in which a group of girls were looking at a group of guys and bought them all a drink. The guys grabbed the drinks and marched towards the girls. There’s nothing strange over here about the girls making the first move.

A few days ago I decided to experiment and went alone to a bar on a rooftop. I didn’t even manage to reach the counter before two guys started to ask me what I would like to drink. I thanked and said no, and got a drink by myself (the guys weren’t attractive enough). I stood at the bar for a few minutes and got approached by two California guys in a row. The first one was in his forties and we spoke briefly. Then I spoke with the second one for about an hour. I have to admit I was amused at how easy all of it was. I was literally laughing out loud as I was leaving the bar.

What happens next? After a short chat (and a quick assessment of “will he do”), usually there’s a request for a phone number. After that question gets asked, it’s your decision: you can give it, or you can… hit another bar.

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